Jeremy
12-05-2008, 04:34 AM
Chapter One -
Once upon a time, in a galaxy not so far away--or, hell, maybe it is the same one we're in now--not a creature was stirring. Not even a mouse. At least, not until someone decided to break into Jack's apartment.
Armed with ninja skills, this man was able to break down the front door and have it not make a sound. When he was born, awesome sauce had been poured over him. Chuck Norris would die ten times all at once in a fight with this person.
Jack awoke to see Charles Widmore's creepy face hovering above him.
"OMFG!!" Jack screamed.
Charles hand came down upon Jack's head in a karate chop and knocked him out. He then preceeded to place him in a bag and carry him over his shoulder.
But just as he was about to escape, something black and large and sporting batwings flew in through the window and landed.
"It's Ben!" Charles gasped, shocked.
"You're not going to get away from me this time," Ben said.
"Get him!" Charles ordered, and his henchmen went after Ben.
But they were no match for Ben; his baton sliced them into strips of crispy bacon which he would eat for breakfast the next morning.
"You'll never catch me!" Charles said.
The old man stole a device from Fringe and went through a wall. Ben tried to follow, but it was no use. The wall was just too solid.
So Ben decided to see what the rest of the O6 were up to. Of course, Sayid and Hurley were gone, and Sun was busy trying to steal information from Widmore, and that only left two others: Kate and Aaron.
So Ben got into his Benmobile and drove out to Kate's house in Whereeveritis and broke through her window.
"Wtf are you doing?" Kate asked, half asleep. "It's fudging 2 in the morning."
"I'm here to tell you that you must go back to the island."
"Can any of you stupid men give me at least one good reason why?"
"You know what month it is, don't you?" Ben asked, and went over to a calender hanging on a nearby wall.
"Yes. It's July. What does that have to do with anything?"
"You must know that once you'd left, the island moved. But you don't have any idea of where it moved to, do you?"
"I guess not..."
"It's not a matter of where, but when. I've got a copy of the calender from the island. Take a look at it."
Ben threw it to Kate and it hit her face. She deserved it. And then she read it.
"It's December. So what?"
"Flip through the pages."
Kate did, and eventually the fact set in.
"You...you mean to say that...that..."
"Yes, Kate. On the island, it's eternally December 25th."
"That's great for them."
"You'd think so, wouldn't you. But bad things have happened to them. They haven't gotten any presents. It effects the rest of the world, too, but nobody realises it because the parents are doing HIS work."
"What the fudge am I supposed to do about it?"
"Not only you, Kate, but the rest of the O6 as well. You all need to go back to the island and restore the Christmas spirit."
Once upon a time, in a galaxy not so far away--or, hell, maybe it is the same one we're in now--not a creature was stirring. Not even a mouse. At least, not until someone decided to break into Jack's apartment.
Armed with ninja skills, this man was able to break down the front door and have it not make a sound. When he was born, awesome sauce had been poured over him. Chuck Norris would die ten times all at once in a fight with this person.
Jack awoke to see Charles Widmore's creepy face hovering above him.
"OMFG!!" Jack screamed.
Charles hand came down upon Jack's head in a karate chop and knocked him out. He then preceeded to place him in a bag and carry him over his shoulder.
But just as he was about to escape, something black and large and sporting batwings flew in through the window and landed.
"It's Ben!" Charles gasped, shocked.
"You're not going to get away from me this time," Ben said.
"Get him!" Charles ordered, and his henchmen went after Ben.
But they were no match for Ben; his baton sliced them into strips of crispy bacon which he would eat for breakfast the next morning.
"You'll never catch me!" Charles said.
The old man stole a device from Fringe and went through a wall. Ben tried to follow, but it was no use. The wall was just too solid.
So Ben decided to see what the rest of the O6 were up to. Of course, Sayid and Hurley were gone, and Sun was busy trying to steal information from Widmore, and that only left two others: Kate and Aaron.
So Ben got into his Benmobile and drove out to Kate's house in Whereeveritis and broke through her window.
"Wtf are you doing?" Kate asked, half asleep. "It's fudging 2 in the morning."
"I'm here to tell you that you must go back to the island."
"Can any of you stupid men give me at least one good reason why?"
"You know what month it is, don't you?" Ben asked, and went over to a calender hanging on a nearby wall.
"Yes. It's July. What does that have to do with anything?"
"You must know that once you'd left, the island moved. But you don't have any idea of where it moved to, do you?"
"I guess not..."
"It's not a matter of where, but when. I've got a copy of the calender from the island. Take a look at it."
Ben threw it to Kate and it hit her face. She deserved it. And then she read it.
"It's December. So what?"
"Flip through the pages."
Kate did, and eventually the fact set in.
"You...you mean to say that...that..."
"Yes, Kate. On the island, it's eternally December 25th."
"That's great for them."
"You'd think so, wouldn't you. But bad things have happened to them. They haven't gotten any presents. It effects the rest of the world, too, but nobody realises it because the parents are doing HIS work."
"What the fudge am I supposed to do about it?"
"Not only you, Kate, but the rest of the O6 as well. You all need to go back to the island and restore the Christmas spirit."